I recently watched an interview with Gayle King and R- Kelly (link below) regarding abuse allegations towards the singer. The questions that Gayle King was asking R-Kelly (& all of the world for that matter) were upsetting for him and he began to display some, questionable and very angry behaviour. The behaviour escalates and he begins to rise up out of his chair and raise his voice, hit his hands and attempt to what looks like intimidate Gayle King as he was clearly as this generation likes to call, "triggered." The reality is, triggered or not he was plain and simply- ANGRY. The anger he presented was uncomfortable to watch and really did not clear his story of being innocent in the slightest. This is not to hate on the singer, or bash him, this is simply a perfect picture of what remaining silent and calm in the midst of turmoil and toxic people can do- if you watch closely Gayle kept seated, calm and allowed him to yell, she did not yell back, raise her voice or let her emotions take charge. This is a perfect example of what the beauty of silence can do.
The key with all of this is how she remains mentally strong, true to values and extremely calm, I think that when you are facing accusations, yelling, behaviour that is wrongful and inappropriate is to know who you are and remain silent. You see, when dogs bark, they can bark all they want, but if they are chained to a leash they have no way of reaching you. This is what toxic behaviour is like, its all talk, its all bark with no bite and these people really are tied to chains that keep them stuck in misery. The longer you sit there and do nothing the less they can do. The best thing you can do is walk away, remove yourself, leave the situation and if you cannot do so, do nothing, say nothing, be silent! I am not saying to you today I have never yelled in my life believe me you I HAVE, especially in my teenage years, but thankfully these are changeable behaviours and often times the toxic behaviour we display is learned behaviour.
Now this does not justify it or make it okay, how R-Kelly was screaming at a full grown woman, embarrasses him more then her, especially given the fact that she didn't react. When you realize that other peoples poor choices in communication style, lack of empathy, or total blindness to their own actions towards people- remember this is nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. Mastering the ability to remain calm whilst the dogs keep barking is not an easy task (let me tell you), but eventually they will give up, you will move on and life will get better- next time you face a toxic person- stay silent and let God handle the rest!!!
LINK BELOW:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LgpIYQi5UNE
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