It is so hard to feel misunderstood, on the outside and feeling like a total alien. You see the thing is when you decide to be completely who you are and it gets mis judged or mis treated it can be a blow to your self-esteem. As a kid you love to do all the things you love to do and just do it, when you grow up people, family, friends who ever decide to share their opinions over you- who you are, what you should do and why you are the way you are, but the simple fact is this- God made you to be you, not to be the one next to you or a copy, but a total original, not to mock those who are not like you, but to love them. There is so much hatred, judgement and opinions being thrown around in the world right now it can feel hard to breathe. All the mental illness diagnosis, illnesses, pain, confusion and all you want to do is run away, but the thing is you are here and here for a reason and life is way to short to let people dictate you or what you should be or do.
Stop trying so hard (note to myself), stop striving and pressuring yourself- just be. Be an artist if you want to paint, be a singer if you want to sing, be a scientist if you want to learn science, be whatever your heart calls you towards, there will be so many people and opinions around you but you must learn to tune them out. Throw on the head phones and listen to the sound of a song that reaches deep within yourself and get lost in the beautiful sounds of hope- hope will get you to where you need to be. I could sit here and tell you all of the crummy things I have been going through and facing, but that will not do me or you any good. Instead I will say this- I have learned that when people reject you, mis-treat you, mock you- that is NOT because you are not enough or you are a joke. It is because of their own insecurity, but you are in-security in the arms of love and the arms of your creator.
When people abandon you- God wont, when people mock you- God wont, when you have no idea why all the craziness is happening around you- God does. "Let it go," as Frozen says! Breathe in love and peace, breathe out pain and confusion- release and peace it. Who cares if people don't get you, who cares if you get judged or mocked, because if you know who you belong too, those things wont matter so much!!! Remember you are loved, chosen, cherished, GOLD and beautiful. Do not diminish the real you or shrink down yourself to fit in or be in the "norm," whatever that is normal is boring, be abnormally YOU!! GOD GETS YOU.
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